August 2007


photography and poetry26 Aug 2007 10:02 am

unsuppressed

For years, copying other people, I tried to know myself.
From within, I couldn’t decide what to do.
Unable to see, I heard my name being called.
Then I walked outside.

The breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you.
Don’t go back to sleep.
You must ask for what you really want.
Don’t go back to sleep.
People are going back and forth across the doorsill
where the two worlds touch.
The door is round and open.
Don’t go back to sleep.

~Rumi

art and photography and sex21 Aug 2007 07:51 pm

Sexual Shrine

“Since when has sex ever been safe? And, if art were safe, it wouldn’t be art.” ~Joanne Ratkowski

art and mystery21 Aug 2007 02:57 pm

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Sculpture “With a Heart of Gold” by Willie Cole, photo by Perry Garvin

I had the distinct pleasure of viewing some amazing artwork by artist, Willie Cole, at the Frye recently. I took my summer camp students to the exhibit and later, had the honor of hearing him speak and shaking his hand. His art is political, spiritual, humorous and very dynamic. It defies labels and I think he probably likes it that way.

He is funny, charming, engaging and very humble. I am so glad I got to meet him. When I told him how much my girls loved his art he replied, “Kids always get what I do. I think it’s because my 12 year-old daughter is my best friend”. How lovely is that?

Here are some notes that I took while he spoke. He said that art making is very much a “subconscious process” for him. He said “The energy flows. My job is to be open to what comes.” I can relate to that very much.

He was once mentored by a Nairobi priest who told him to, “Make something and tell it what to do. Let it go do that.” Willie humorously said that one piece was told to “go pay the bills”. I just love that.

The thing that I was most moved by and which I have since quoted several times is this: Willie was asked by a gentleman in the audience how he felt he fit into the “African American Art Movement”. Willie very respectfully said, “I don’t. Artists transcend labels. I don’t know many European artists who are known by their ethnicity”. He went on to say, “If you want to conquer something, label it. In fact, I don’t really like the word ‘artist’. I prefer ‘perceptual engineer’”. That just makes me smile.

He said he is, “Inspired by everything.” He wonders “Where do things cross? Where do the conquests and the settlements come together?” He said “It’s not about the objects, it’s about the Spirit of the object. All things are one thing.” He also mentioned “Synchronized moments and energy”. He said, “If you line up five objects in a line and look at them from the right perspective, you see one thing”. (I LOVE THAT!)

On artmaking:

“Doing commissioned pieces brings balance”

“With sculpture, I just play. I start with a pile of things and see what they want to be.”

“Before I had an art dealer, I wanted to live all my dreams at once and got nowhere.” (I can relate to that!)

“I was told to sleep with pieces before I let them go”.

He also told a story similar to this one from Yoruban Mythology about Eshu Elegba which I loved. Eshu Elegba is at once a messenger, holder of power and authority and guardian. He is associated with disorder and destiny as well. Willie referred to him as a “Master of Potentiality”.

Eshu was walking down the road one day, wearing a hat that was red on one side and blue on the other. Sometime after he departed, the villagers who had seen him began arguing about whether the stranger’s hat was blue or red. The villagers on one side of the road had only been capable of seeing the blue side, and the villagers on the other side had only been capable of seeing the red half. They nearly fought over the argument, until Eshu came back and cleared the mystery, teaching the villagers about how one’s perspective can alter one’s perception of reality, and can be easily fooled.

Yes, perspective is a huge issue in this world. We can believe in the Oneness of Life, or we can choose to believe that there is some kind of schism between us and others or everything. I think Willie Cole is on the right track by refusing to accept labels. We sort and parse and label to divide and conquer.

I choose to swim in the world of the Divine Matrix and celebrate the Oneness of life.

healing and honesty and photography and self-excavation and truth21 Aug 2007 02:15 pm

5th Chakra

Over the past several years, I’ve been mindfully working on authenticity, issues with bullies, shadows of pain from the past and speaking uncomfortable truths. A lifetime of people pleasing and fear took a long time to rework. I feel like I have finally found my voice, like I can speak my truth and feel completely supported by my own inner knowing.

I had to make one of the most difficult decisions of my life recently in speaking my inner truth to someone I care for deeply. The weight that I feel lifted and the deep peace I feel as a result are astonishing. It was not without pain but it was right and I knew/know it deeply in my heart.

In finding my voice, I have found a freedom I didn’t know existed and it is very good.

healing and self-excavation and sincerity21 Aug 2007 02:07 pm

shalom
Something I ran across in a journal that I wrote several months ago when I was really struggling with judgment:

“I’m pretty sure the world will never be healed by preaching and condemnation. It is by living an inspired life that I can most effectively impact that world around me.”

Peace Pilgrim said, “When you find peace within yourself, you become the kind of person who can live at peace with others.”

That is my deepest desire and where I am putting my energy.

And so it is.

Uncategorized21 Aug 2007 02:07 pm

I have been synthesizing a lot of late. I have been walking more and more squarely into developing my psychic awareness and living a more spirit-led life. This means consciously choosing pretty much everything and living in a place of open surrender. It means when things don’t feel quite right, I have to listen. It means tuning in to my Higher Self and tuning out the myriad voices in the external world. It’s filled with amazing grace and not without pain.

I have called this experience to myself as I wish to live an inspired life, not a life of ego-led, ego-feeding complacency. I wish to serve the Greater Good always and, as such, I must listen to the call of my heart. I have found that this is not a popular choice. It is, however, deeply rewarding.

I endeavor these days to be spiritual, not act spiritual and I have a much deeper sense of peace as a result. A peace that comes not from rejecting shadow but integrating it. A peace that comes from seeing others as the souls they are not the role they play in my life. This expands my awareness exponentially and helps me with one of the biggest aspects of my own shadow: judgment.

Forgiving, releasing, integrating, accepting, being…

Walking in Love.

mystery and poetry10 Aug 2007 08:49 pm

This beautiful poem arrived in my email box tonight.

The words make me ache with something…like reaching for fingertips but not quite getting there or continually being on the edge of an orgasm…

it’s beautiful.

the scent of desire

Friend
by Martin Challis

I have kissed you in many mouths;
those hunted doorways
emptying
like children from school.

I have tasted you
but not found you,
you’ve been elsewhere;
the curl of your tongue
forming a ribbon in wind.

The cut of your hair
tied into shapes
I could make with my hands.
Your voice;
breezes in phrases
I reach for their possible echo.

I have waited to bend you
into my smile, how
my mouth has made its reasons
for wanting the shape
of your name,
and the marriage of words
I have learnt
just to speak of you.

I have called for you
devoured air for you
devoured my name
and not found you.

Are you there friend
now or waiting,
or passing as a ribbon in wind
curling slowly
to the tip
of my tongue.

Uncategorized09 Aug 2007 07:10 am

Dear Soul

“with each true friendship, we build more firmly the foundation
on which the peace of the whole world rests.”
~Mahatma Gandhi

I have never known a truer friend or more benevolent soul than this man. I am truly blessed to call him my friend. Our friendship goes beyond the cellular level to the soulular level.

I am blessed beyond measure and cry with joy and gratitude as I type this.

Thank you for being in my life, dear man. Thank you to Great Spirit for pulling us into one another’s matrix.

healing and journal09 Aug 2007 06:58 am

wreck this journal | loathing to love

“forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds
on the heel that has crushed it.”
~Mark Twain

This is a journal entry that was transmutated from self-loathing to self-love. I am finding that forgiveness of myself and others is the biggest change agent for moving from the constricted, dark space of loathing to the open, light-filled and juicy space of LOVE.

love and photography and poetry06 Aug 2007 04:59 pm

purification

blame is a sour boar
piercing the heart with
fierce tusks of shame
creation craves compassion
and the flickering love dance
of a gentle heart